I was asked to have a personal meetup with someone who has been interested in Ti and Do’s information for a number of years and who I have had communication with. I told him I’d keep it in mind. Below is our exchange. I wondered if it might prove useful to others. He is listed as “M”.
M: Thank you, I would understand if you declined, I know you’ve mentioned in the past with talking to people who seemed genuine but had ulterior motives. Either way I look forward to you releasing your book.
I find myself thinking about hg more and more as time goes on. I have a great deal of difficulty understanding the blue book, but from what I can understand as well as what I watch I find myself so drawn to it.
Sawyer: As you know I joined with Ti and Do in 1975. In 2000 when I began to re-awaken that brought me back to reading and watching Do on the tapes, etc. I was amazed how many things they said and did went right over my head at the time. It’s like there are layers of understanding all they say. Often when I’d read I’d overlook one or two words here and there, that when I would go back to I stop at and see a new angle, I guess because it’s like a picture and one can only really see a certain amount of detail if their brain isn’t atuned to yet. I used to think I had pretty good comprehension and they would encourage us to re-listen to their taped meetings often and as I was always busy with an assortment of tasks, I sort of put re-listening to tapes on the back burner as not really needed for me.
Ti told me in a note once when she delivered a note to each student that contained what we each needed to work on that otherwise “would keep us off the spacecraft”. I don’t know what anyone else’s note said but mine had three things on it: 1) Likes to be seen as something special, 2) A little too pleased with self and 3) sarcastic with humans. #3 came from some of the confrontations I had with employers in kitchens when I was a cook as that was the only interface I had with what we called humans, those who were not trying to detach from the human kingdom at that time, at least in the accelerated way we were attempting to do. Some of the cooks would start swearing and talking down to the waitstaff and the other cooks and even throw things, especially during the peak times when the pressure was on and I would be too “cool” and sometimes would comment to cool down or laugh off the pressure and all that did was infuriate them more. That’s what Ti was referring to I believe. I came across to them as sarcastic.
But #2 – a little to pleased with self, really rings true to me now more than it did then, not necessarily applicable now more or less than before but because of what I just reported about the way I thought while in the classroom I didn’t need to re-listen to the tapes, with the implication Ti was saying that for others more than for me. My ego was inflated and there were other huge signs that I couldn’t see then but now I can. I believe all humans have a certain amount of ego. It’s normal and it’s encouraged and if we don’t we’re considered lessor so it’s also competitive. So, the best advise I can give is to re-read, re-listen to tapes. It is a “self” stimulated degree of brain washing, I guess one could say, although brain washing to me is getting rid of misinformation from our thinking and acting relative to what the Next Level values. So I guess listening to tapes over again would also be getting rid of misinformation which would be part of absorbing more and more of Ti and Do’s MIND – words/info.
Even these days, I get filled up with Next Level information at times when I re-read and re-listen to things Ti and Do have given us. I know I’ve had about all I can absorb when I start to disbelieve or doubt or feel my belief or commitment/faith/trust in them is being challenged. It’s because it take a huge effort to embrace their realities and depending on how much of our mind energy we are giving away daily has a correlation with how much energy we have to gain consciousness that is above human. That’s where the entire idea of waking the kundelini force comes from, except applied to heightening SELF instead of purging self, which is required to be a prospective member of the Next Level (though we still become a SELF after graduating the human kingdom but even more so than humans because Self for humans consists of many inputs from discarnates throughout our lives and of course our relationships and society in combo with the genetic tendencies our vehicles inherit at birth.
So when I feel that negativity rises I stop reading or listening and give it a rest until I feel my thirst build again. And that’s the beauty of giving service to Ti and Do by disseminating their information to others – when we do and especially when there is a genuine draw as you are doing with me now in looking for help in your walk, I get to give away that part of my mind that was given to me by Ti and Do and that makes more room for me to receive more. It increases my thirst to know more. If we just study all the time we get saturated and need to give it away to receive more. I believe it’s given away in any form but it’s most given away when there is a draw for it and for me that comes from the various internet communication mediums we have, whether it’s in a comment on a news site about a story or whatever, though if I am just giving my opinion about something that I can’t relate to Ti and Do then I’m not freeing up space or as much space in our Ti and Do mind reservoir that can be defined as the “soul” container/pocket. And when we give Ti and Do’s info away it’s making more room for more which includes better understanding of the same info we are giving away. As we progress in this walk it only really continues to work if we continue to changeover our energy flow from lateral – between fellow humans and vertical – to the Next Level Older members. If we try to do both – continue human behaviors and grow our Next Level mind in our soul container it ends up eventually making us crabby and a host of other negative characteristics as we see displayed among many and especially many who are religious. They get intolerant, impatient, self righteous, misunderstanding, arrogant, etc. even though they are talking about what Jesus said. Many religious and spiritual and of course atheistic people as well can seem pleasant and kind and gentle, until you cross them in the smallest of ways and they can then turn very, very ugly fast. Maybe I’m getting off subject but that’s where the thread has taken me.
M: Thank you for sharing something so personal with me
I find myself feeling instead for a few weeks but soon burn out
Sawyer: And as I’m writing all this to you, I was reminded why sometimes, even often times it’s not better to talk face to face. I don’t know about you, but when I’m with someone trying to talk like I’m talking now, I can hardly focus because I am so distracted by my influences interacting with your influences. We all have them. They will challenge eveything I say and what ends up happening is I spend tons of time qualifying to satisfy the thoughts the influence is feeding me that you may be thinking about or may not be – doesn’t matter – that I don’t actually stay “in tune” with my Older Member’s mind. When I’m in my protected environment as now I’m free of most of that as the influences don’t know what I’m saying. I don’t think they can read -lol – but I”m serious, but they can decipher words because it’s part of their program they developed while living as a human as it’s all about frequencies and the “hearing”. Eyes also distract. I have to often look away from someone I’m talking to, to focus because the eyes not only absorb light (data) but give it off as well and in that way also influence the other. That’s why Ti and Do told us not to lock eyes with one another unless you were talking to them about something specific. Then you would look at the person you are talking to but we are still influenced from doing so, which is why at one time Ti and Do had us wear hoods that had silver screens for eyes to see through as it was an experiment to not be influenced by anothers face/eyes, etc.
M: I’ll be reading than think how can I believe a word of this…
Sawyer: yes, i understand, the same for me at times. Ti and Do taught that those were influences, whether it was all the time or not – it works to think of it that way.
Do said at one time that not a day went by that he didn’t question his own sanity, but even though he couldn’t deny that he had to push past that because he knew it was more true than anythng else.
Do compared hanging on to this truth as hanging on to a cliff by your fingertips but not giving up.
When he said that, I remember thinking…it doesn’t feel that hard for me.
It wasn’t like I was disbelieving him. It was more like I didn’t see how it applied, so that is a degree of disbelief, but was because of my ignorance, because I had little idea of what I had left to conquer.
I was too full of myself in a subtle way. I don’t think anyone would have said that about me really. It was subtle but deep seated so when it was brought to a head late in 1993, I took a nose dive and could not even want to recover so eventually had to leave.
M: I can imagine living with the class full time lent no moment to feel burnt out
Or if it did those feelings may have been hard to deal with
Sawyer: You are right I think, at least for me and I’d say for many but I would call it saturation. Ti and Do were very, very aware to not give us too much at any one time so meeting were rarely more than an hour long and we rarely had them more often than every 3-4 days. Ti and Do told us we needed time to absorb what they gave us. And by the way, that’s why they also gave us things to do to distract us. Television shows – trips to the movies every week or two in the last years and other outings to zoo’s, museums, restaurants a couple times each a year maybe. We had exercise machines and took long walks most everyday. At one point had a tennis court and often had a swimming pool. We had birds during one short time period. We sang psalms as a chorus around a couple christmas times. We had great menus though sometimes challenging.
Sawyer: We made deserts for every night. Ti and Do were not against pleasure but for their program they needed to be the ones to design the pleasures we had and how often and the degree.
They often assigned us to take naps although they also experimented with sleep patterns with us, but mostly they were short lived. For instance for a couple weeks we lived on sleeping 2 hours and then up for 4 hours each day. Then we had 6 hour sleep periods but settled into 6 as a minimum and 8 as a maximum with an occasional requirement to stay in the bunk for 9 hours. If we couldn’t sleep that whole time we were instructed to lay there and meditate or just be quiet.